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Santanfara
3460 Posts |
 Posted - 13 Jan 2008 : 11:29:41
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A Gambian who took me as a friend and companion was involve in an uncomfortable love triangle for the past five years in U.K. This man is in his early 40's .He came from the Gambia some time in 2002 but was refuse entry into u.k and then he apply for asylum. his application was provisionally accepted pending further assessments. he was then asked to provide some one who will provide him an address and a place to stay before his application is finalised.
Now this guy knew only one person who could provide him this facility and that man is his close friend way back in the Gambia and when they were living in Scandinavia .After the friend was contacted ,he did not waste any time ,the friend is a European citizen resident through marriage. he will be allowed to take the friend home with him but on certain conditions. one of which is that the asylum seeker must report to a nearby police station every week.
That was sorted. I will refer to the asylum seeker as Mr LT. Interestingly ,the Friend who provided a place for Mr LT to stay until his application is sorted was also expecting his new bride from the Gambia on the flight that brought LT. the bride's name is NJ.
Whilst in the flight the two ,Mr LT and Mrs NJ exchange greetings and it may be love at first sight . after both were pick up by the husband of NJ whom i will refer to as MB.
They proceeded to Manchester city u.k to live. MB provided all the necessary facility LT needs to have a comfortable stay before the immigration will sort out his applications. MB who was divorce from his Scandinavian wife ,but is with his Scandinavian passport has all the facilities available to EU national in U.K. he was given a council house ,which is spacious and comfortable. the rent is a little lower than private properties. But MB has to work. he took some days off to enjoy the company of his new bride .after his holiday period was over he went back to work.
LT is not allowed to work, he stayed home with the bride of MB all day whilst MB is busy at work. It was during this material time that ,LT started sleeping with the wife of his friend ,his rescuer. MB never suspect a thing for a while .but not for long ,some one else saw the two in town hand in hand just as MB would have done if he wasn't at his day job. That person is also a friend of MB. he was a bit shocked to see two like that. He phoned MB straight away to inform him of what he show. MB never took that call seriously. he though his other friend was mistaken. But on weekends when MB is at home ,LT and NJ acted suspiciously for MB's comfort. he started to suspect some thing. MB then arranged a place for LT with some of his single friends. LT accepted that offer. he moved to stay with MB's single friends close by. He never told LT why he decided to move him out of his house.
To MB's horror his wife regularly visit LT at his new place when MB is at work. The friend's again reported that matter to MB who was very sad but now angry. he confronted LT and vow to withdraw his guarantee for him with the immigrations. After that threat, LT made some contacts and absconded from Manchester in live my city.
I never knew any thing about his past behaviour in Manchester. After few weeks ,NJ ran away from the husband to come and stay with LT in my city. Still no one knew what was going on. LT told every one the lady is his wife.they got married recently in Manchester. MB doesn't know where LT lives or where his wife went to. He then started asking around until it was reveal to him that LT lives in the west midlands.
MB though was angry ,he calm himself down and brought with him two of his friends to persuade his wife to return back to Manchester with him. MB and his friends came to my city and they started asking around for LT. LT was using a new name ,they looked around for two days to no avail. Fortunately on the third day ,whilst waiting at the train station ,they show a Gambian who told them were The two live. Unannounced ,MB and his friends went straight to LT's house. They knock the door and NJ unsuspecting open the door only to see her husband with his friends waiting outside. By this period LT has learn his tricks ,he is working on someone else's papers and living a bit comfortable even though his application was later rejected and he was asked to leave the u.k. MB promise not to say where LT lives unless he promise stay away from his wife .LT accepted that truce .MB took his wife home with him but only for three weeks. She ran back to LT .After this ,the husband left her alone.
LT was reported to immigrations ,he was arrested but refuse to go back. he spent one year in several detention centres across u.k .now they let him free. he is still living with NJ .
I never knew any of this until few weeks ago. LT is a very pleasant Gambian. he is friendly and smooth. I was in a friend's house when a guy from Manchester came to visit him. during the usual chit chat ,he asked about NJ . i said oh, she is married to my best friend. he frowned. i said what happen? it was after which the guy explain the whole situation .i was shocked.
When LT was arrested ,his wife told us it was for driving offences .he was driving without a license,no insurance and road tax. that is a big crime in U.K .i believed her. we arrange a fund raising for her and their new Born baby .no one told me any thing about LT stealing some one Else's wife. I later enquire more ,the story is true. LT's own family brother in U.K cut off all ties with him because of that act .
Is this story LOVE between two consenting adults or BETRAYAL ? for me it is a betrayal and a shocking scenario that is shameful and disgusting. .
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Surah- Ar-Rum 30-22
"And among His signs is the creation of heavens and the earth, and the difference of your languages and colours. verily, in that are indeed signs for men of sound knowledge." Qu'ran
www.suntoumana.blogspot.com |
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kayjatta
2978 Posts |
Posted - 13 Jan 2008 : 12:50:40
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| I think it is a betrayal of trust and friendship. Very immoral. I have seen a similar one before also. In some states in the U.S. "stealing" someone's spouse is a civil offense. The cause of action is called 'alienation of affection' and the plaintiff (victim who sues) could get monetary compensation for the loss of the affection of the spouse. Interesting case. |
Edited by - kayjatta on 13 Jan 2008 13:09:53 |
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Sister Omega
United Kingdom
2085 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jan 2008 : 19:35:07
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A betrayal of a husband by his wife and best friend is a bitter pill to swallow. I think the senario boils down to intention if the wife loved her husband she wouldn't of committed adultery with his friend. Neither would his friend of slept with his wife. It just seems like this relationship wasn't meant to be and in the future when MB reflects on the past hopefully he will be in a much better place in his life within a genuine relationship with a wife who loves him for who he is and not what he has. with friends who are loyal with better morals. This scenario could be considered a blessing in disguise for MB. He just needs to keep up his faith and know that we all can make plans but the Creator is the Master Planner.
Peace
Sister Omega |
Peace
Sister Omega |
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Santanfara
3460 Posts |
Posted - 15 Jan 2008 : 10:27:45
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| very thoughtful sister o. MB is a brave man. i wouldn't have gone after a lady who abandon me for another man. but he was courageous and gentle. |
Surah- Ar-Rum 30-22
"And among His signs is the creation of heavens and the earth, and the difference of your languages and colours. verily, in that are indeed signs for men of sound knowledge." Qu'ran
www.suntoumana.blogspot.com |
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jambo
3300 Posts |
Posted - 15 Jan 2008 : 12:33:46
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| mb has a deep soul |
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Dalton1
3485 Posts |
Posted - 15 Jan 2008 : 13:37:26
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Uncle Suntou,
Your sharing of such nice stories makes you among the greatest contributors in this forum. You know how i like stories, please keep them coming as time permits you.....i am still stocked on reading Momodou's forward "Welcome to Mouridism." I can tell you though, i got lost in the piece several times...maybe by te weekend...maybe you can help...
Regards,
Dalton. |
"There is no god but Allah (SWT); and Muhammad (SAW)is His last messenger." shahadah. Fear & Worship Allah (SWT) Alone! (:
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Prince
507 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jan 2008 : 01:13:15
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Sadly, LT abominable action is becoming frequent, and its really worrying.
He clearly demonstrated his stupidity by trusting a woman who is capable of betraying her husband for a crook like him.
BUT Santafara, isn't this a consequent of arranged marriages based on VANITY and DECEPTION?
It is becoming a very common trend for Gambian families to marry their daughters to so-called semesters as a ticket to better life...
I'm assuming that a majority of these marriages are causing harm and creating broken homes/families? |
"When injustice becomes law, rebellion becomes duty." |
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Santanfara
3460 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jan 2008 : 13:43:27
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thanks dalton. respect always.
prince, you may be right but the way to anull a marriage should be according to our customs and principles. i have seen another incident where a gambain marries a young lady without even seeing her. from the pictures he show,this man fall madly inlove with this woman. but sadly after spending close to £2500 to bring her to england. he was dump at the airport. the girl was so upront that the man nearly died. she told him in the midst of his friend at gatwick airport that ''i don't love you''. ''how can i marry such a man with big belly and short neck''?. i mean that man went crazy. the lady's brothers in london convince her to stay with him ,she may come to like him but it never work. this man at the end became so quiet ,we thought that he will go mad. the girl is stil in london ,but the marriage is over .arrange marriage can be fatal. but in the case of MB ,it is not arrange marriage. it is a case falling out of love in a bad way. |
Surah- Ar-Rum 30-22
"And among His signs is the creation of heavens and the earth, and the difference of your languages and colours. verily, in that are indeed signs for men of sound knowledge." Qu'ran
www.suntoumana.blogspot.com |
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gambiabev
United Kingdom
3091 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jan 2008 : 14:04:46
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Why should a women accept marrying someone she has never even seen!
She isnot a commodity! She has thoughts and feelings of her own.
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MeMe
United Kingdom
541 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jan 2008 : 14:43:48
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| Which she should have recognised/voiced before this poor guy spent all that money on her surely, Bev????!!!! |
It is better to die standing than to live on your knees - Ernesto Guevara de la Serna |
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gambiabev
United Kingdom
3091 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jan 2008 : 15:08:20
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| Did she have a choice? Sorry? I thought it was arranged by her family. |
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MeMe
United Kingdom
541 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jan 2008 : 15:19:09
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| She's hardly a lamb to the slaughter if she was able to put her feelings into words upon arrival at a 'foreign' airport and in front of her 'husband', brother and the rest of the welcome party. Free ticket to the UK springs to mind here ...... |
It is better to die standing than to live on your knees - Ernesto Guevara de la Serna |
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turk
USA
3356 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jan 2008 : 21:40:38
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MB used to be married to a european woman, than get the EU citizenship, than divorce. It may have been a god's justice for MB if he wasn't sincere for this european woman, just to get papers than married to some lady from gambia just for. Off course, he could have been sincere.
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diaspora! Too many Chiefs and Very Few Indians.
Halifa Salah: PDOIS is however realistic. It is fully aware that the Gambian voters are yet to reach a level of political consciousness that they rely on to vote on the basis of Principles, policies and programmes and practices. |
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toubab1020
12309 Posts |
Posted - 16 Jan 2008 : 21:40:56
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"You could say that but I could not possibly comment"
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"Simple is good" & I strongly dislike politics. You cannot defend the indefensible.
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serenata
Germany
1400 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jan 2008 : 14:02:35
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Santanfara, this is a moving story. But really, nobody can expect a woman to stay with a husband she has been forced to marry. Maybe you guys will get this one day, but until this time, stories like this one will happen over and over again, and their number will increase.
I don't know all connotations of the English language, but you wrote 'the friend.... was expecting his new bride'. This sounds to me like 'his new car' or something like this. Imagine: WOMEN ARE HUMAN BEINGS - JUST LIKE MEN! Maybe MB forgot this, 'dumped' his 'old' Scandinavian wife - and this was God's revenge... |
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serenata
Germany
1400 Posts |
Posted - 17 Jan 2008 : 14:06:20
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Turk, I didn't read your comment before I wrote mine, but now I see we had the same thing in mind.
Congratulations - your daughter is so sweet! |
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