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Santanfara
3460 Posts |
 Posted - 04 Apr 2007 : 11:35:13
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what is this one very memorable thing that doesn't want go away ?
mine is a bit embarrassing .i met this young lady during our high school back in the early 90's . we never mention any thing about liking each other but we both have some feelings for one another. so after high school she enroll in a computer programming course in gtti and i went to do my a'levels. we kept some form of contact but very minimal. she married a year later to some rich guy call karamo . i was devastated. she has moved on . i was stocked with her always in my mind. i try my best to clear every single memory of her but i couldn't .i worked in some govermnet department for some time ,then got enroll in mdi for my accountancy foundation course. after which i travelled. she email me time to time but on a brotherly basis. i did not entertain that situation. she loved this man and i became her angony ant.
then some time later i got a news from my best friend in u.s early one morning ,that my high school friend as pass away. i told him it is the most rediculous joke ever. he was serious ,she died. she died of throat infection .i couldn't believe it. i call her mother straight away .she live with her husband in kanifing estate. when the phone rang she pick it up ,i said it is me laugh ,laugh .that is my nick name then ,i always smile .she said yes she passed away .i what happen .
this is now six years ago but i cannot still forget about this lady.
true i have since got married and with chids. but time to time i dream of this lady. it is not disturbing me but i just want to share some thing intimate about my past.
life can be strange some times.
i pray that God bless her soul in eternal bliss. amen
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Surah- Ar-Rum 30-22
"And among His signs is the creation of heavens and the earth, and the difference of your languages and colours. verily, in that are indeed signs for men of sound knowledge." Qu'ran
www.suntoumana.blogspot.com |
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inez
279 Posts |
Posted - 04 Apr 2007 : 13:04:49
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| thanks for sharing this with us. it was certainly very sad..not only that she past away but also because you "woke up" too late. somehow you didnt get these strong feelings for her before she got married? this might be a lesson for all of us: donīt wait...go for your love and if you are not sure about your feelings...imagine how it would feel if the person get occupied with someone else... |
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Santanfara
3460 Posts |
Posted - 04 Apr 2007 : 22:56:38
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quote:
Originally posted by inez
thanks for sharing this with us. it was certainly very sad..not only that she past away but also because you "woke up" too late. somehow you didnt get these strong feelings for her before she got married? this might be a lesson for all of us: donīt wait...go for your love and if you are not sure about your feelings...imagine how it would feel if the person get occupied with someone else...
true inez , i was not capable enough at that time to get married. my father would have foot the bill but i always wanted to stand on my own .she wasn't happy about waiting few more years.but that's how it was meant to be i suppose. |
Surah- Ar-Rum 30-22
"And among His signs is the creation of heavens and the earth, and the difference of your languages and colours. verily, in that are indeed signs for men of sound knowledge." Qu'ran
www.suntoumana.blogspot.com |
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leokat
United Kingdom
123 Posts |
Posted - 05 Apr 2007 : 14:23:42
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Santanfara, your story was very touching.
Personally, I think you were (at least a little)'In Love' with the woman who died. Maybe you did not realise this at the time; maybe you just weren't mature enough at the time for all the responsibilities, difficult feelings, and emotions love brings; maybe, even though you were in love with her, she wasn't 'The One' (I appreciate that the concept of a 'one' love is a Western ideal).
It would seem that, whatever the truth of the feelings you had for each other, there was enough of a spark between you for you to maintain a lasting connection. However, because these feelings never developed into an actual physical/marital/sexual relationship they never matured. Instead they stayed as a hazy, dreamlike, reminder of 'What Might Have Been'.
'What Might Have Beens' have a habit of distorting reality. At times whan one's life is taking one path it is tempting to wonder if things might have been different (better) if one had followed another path. When life is difficult it is tempting to think that taking the other path would have easier. It is all too easy to imagine that the fantasy one has built up in one's mind is better than the reality one lives with on a day to day basis.
We have a saying here in the West - 'The Grass Is Always Greener.' Meaning, basically, that the thing which we do not have can often seem more attractive and alluring than that which is ours.
However, the Christian bible teaches us not to covet that which is not ours.
At the time of her death your friend was married to someone else. You too are a married man with children. My advice to you would be: remember your friend fondly; thank the lord for her part in your life and all she taught you; then say goodbye to her memory and the fantasy of 'What Might Have Been'. Hopefully, you will then be able to look anew at the reality of what you actually have with the clouds removed from your eyes.
Ok that's my amateur psychology lesson over for the day!  |
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Santanfara
3460 Posts |
Posted - 05 Apr 2007 : 16:18:26
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| leokat ,that wasn't an amataur lesson but a very good one . i will bid her fairwell as you advice and carry on with life.thanks for your time. |
Surah- Ar-Rum 30-22
"And among His signs is the creation of heavens and the earth, and the difference of your languages and colours. verily, in that are indeed signs for men of sound knowledge." Qu'ran
www.suntoumana.blogspot.com |
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